Written by Xolisa who journeyed through the Hesketh King Treatment Centre recovery programme, this deeply personal poem captures the painful reality of addiction and the courage it takes to walk away from it. Through honest reflection, the writer speaks directly to alcohol as though addressing a once-trusted companion that slowly became destructive and devastating. The poem gives voice to the heartbreak, loss, isolation, and regret that addiction can bring, while also revealing a powerful moment of awakening and resolve. It is a moving reminder of how easily addiction can take hold, but also how healing can begin when a person finally sees the truth and chooses a different path.
To Alcohol…
The time for our separation is now.
The time is now for me to let you go.
When we first met, I saw good in you.
When I kissed you, you left a sweet taste in my lips.
After that I told myself – this is the only.
In you I buried my sorrows.
I defended against the people who loved me.
I protected you when people wanted to harm.
I kept on asking myself: “How can I abandon you when you’re so nice?”
“How can I let you go when you are so good?”
When people tried to convince me to leave you,
I never listened. I thought they’re jealous
But, one by one my friends left me.
One by one my family disowned me – Did I care? No.
One by one people lost trust in me – Did I care? No.
One by one people lost interest in me – Did I care? No.
Day by day you chipped a piece away from me – Did I notice that? No.
Now that my eyes are open, I can see your true colours and intentions.
I know now not just your intentions, but your abilities too.
I know how you can turn a lover into a monster.
You have destroyed families.
Children are orphans.
Some have only one parent.
You have killed – You have disabled
You have brought disasters and disappointments.
People are maimed. People are miserable.
Now I have seen your true colours.
I have decided to be alone
than having you on my side.
My joy has flown away – my heart is sick.
Grief has settled in me – my eyes are a fountain of tears.
This is all because of you.
Now I know that you’re a brain drain.
Can you remember me? No.
Why? Because you don’t care just as long as you’ve destroyed me.
Do you still love me? No.
Why? Because you are looking for the next victim.
You’re happy now that you’ve stripped me to nothing.
I wish I can see and know your next victims
so that I could warn them about you.
The decision I have taken to leave you,
I do not regret.
I just wish I never met you.
What Xolisa describes is not unusual. Addiction often begins quietly. What feels like comfort can slowly take hold, shaping choices and affecting relationships until a person feels they are no longer free. The Salvation Army recognises this reality. When Salvationists commit to abstain from alcohol and other addictive substances, it is not based on a single reason or a simple rule. It is part of a wider calling to live a life that honours God, protects personal freedom, and cares for the wellbeing of others. This commitment reflects a desire to guard the body, mind and spirit from anything that could lead to dependence or take control. It is also about choosing a way of life that promotes wholeness and integrity, allowing a person to serve God and others without being held back.
At the same time, Salvationists are called to stand with those who struggle. Addiction does not only touch the individual. It reaches into families, relationships and communities, often leaving lasting hurt. In response, The Salvation Army seeks to bring care rather than criticism. Those who struggle are not rejected or pushed aside. They are welcomed, listened to, and supported with patience and understanding. It is important to walk alongside people as they begin to find their way back. Healing is often a journey that takes time. Each step matters. Each step forward is encouraged.
Recovery from substance abuse is possible. No matter how trapped or overwhelmed a person may feel, there is hope, help, and support available. God is able to bring healing, restoration, and new beginnings, even in situations that may seem hopeless. You do not have to struggle alone. If you or a loved one are struggilng, reach out to your nearest Salvation Army and speak to an Officer, who can walk alongside you, pray with you, and help connect you to the support and care you may need.