Forgiveness. It’s one of those words we hear often in church, yet, when it comes time to actually live it out, it’s something much harder to grasp. We’re quick to understand forgiveness in theory—it sounds beautiful, doesn’t it? The promise of a fresh start, the chance to let go of bitterness and anger, a way to bring peace to fractured relationships. But the act of forgiving, especially when it feels undeserved, is something else entirely.
In the Bible, forgiveness is not just a theological concept. It’s a command, a way of life, a gift we give both to others and to ourselves. And it’s a necessary part of living as children of God, who, as Scripture tells us, forgave us when we were undeserving and in need of mercy.
The Necessity of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is not just a suggestion; it’s central to the life of the believer. In the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus teaches His disciples to pray, “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us” (Matthew 6:12). This is an important connection: God’s forgiveness of us is intrinsically tied to our willingness to forgive others. It’s not just about seeking forgiveness for our own wrongs, but about extending that same grace to others.
Jesus tells a parable in Matthew 18:23-35 about a servant who owes his master a great debt, one he could never repay. The master forgives the debt in full, yet the servant refuses to extend forgiveness to someone who owes him a small amount. When the master learns of this, he rebukes the servant and rescinds his forgiveness. The message is clear: if we have received forgiveness, we are obligated to forgive others.
This isn’t a new idea, and it doesn’t hinge on the other person’s repentance. Forgiveness is not about whether someone deserves it, or whether they ask for it. It’s about the love and mercy we have experienced in Christ and the call to reflect that love to others.
A Process, Not a One-Time Event
Forgiveness is often more than a single decision. It’s a journey, a daily choice, and sometimes, a struggle. And the struggle is real. In moments of pain or betrayal, it’s easy to feel justified in holding onto anger. Yet, when we do, we chain ourselves to the past and to the wrongs done to us, instead of moving forward in the freedom God intends for us.
In Ephesians 4:31-32, Paul writes, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Forgiveness isn’t a one-time act of kindness, but a continuous choice to let go of the bitterness and anger that can easily take root in our hearts. It’s about choosing grace, even when we don’t feel like it, and offering it freely as God has offered it to us.
The grace of God works in us in such a way that we are continually transformed by His love. It is this ongoing process of sanctification—the gradual work of becoming more like Christ—that enables us to forgive. As we grow in understanding of God’s forgiveness toward us, we are empowered to forgive others. This isn’t something we can do on our own. We are constantly dependent on God’s grace to release others from the debt they owe us.
The Cost of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is costly. It costs us our right to hold onto resentment, to demand justice, and to harbour bitterness. Forgiveness costs us the need to be “right” and the urge to seek vengeance. In Colossians 3:13, Paul instructs believers, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
God didn’t forgive us because we earned it. He didn’t wait for us to prove ourselves worthy. He forgave us in our brokenness, in our disobedience, and in our complete inability to repay the debt we owed Him. Likewise, when we forgive others, we reflect God’s mercy, not because they deserve it, but because we have been transformed by grace.
Forgiveness is costly because it’s a surrender of our own will, our own desire for justice, our own right to control the situation. It’s about trusting God with the outcome, knowing that His justice is perfect, and His mercy is sufficient. This doesn’t mean we ignore wrongdoing or allow ourselves to be perpetually hurt. But it does mean we release the burden of anger and the desire for retribution, trusting that God will make all things right in His time.
The Freedom of Forgiveness
One of the greatest gifts of forgiveness is the freedom it brings. When we forgive, we let go of the chains that bind us to past hurts and injustices. We are no longer controlled by the anger or bitterness that once defined our relationship with the person who wronged us. Forgiveness brings rest. It brings peace. It allows us to move forward with God’s help, no longer weighed down by the pain of our past. As we forgive, we become free to fully experience the joy and peace of God’s presence in our lives. We are free to love, to heal, and to live in the fullness of His grace.
The Power of Forgiveness in God’s Kingdom
Forgiveness is not just a personal act; it has communal and kingdom implications. In 2 Corinthians 5:18-19, Paul writes, “All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them.” The forgiveness we extend is not just for our own good, but for the good of the world around us. By forgiving, we participate in God’s work of reconciliation—restoring relationships and healing brokenness in a fractured world.
In the kingdom of God, forgiveness is a key element in the work of restoration. It is through forgiveness that we experience reconciliation with God and with one another. It is through forgiveness that we reflect the love of Christ to the world, demonstrating the transformative power of God’s grace.
Forgiveness is costly, yet it is a central and essential act in the Christian life. It is a response to the overwhelming grace we have received in Christ, and it is the means by which we continue to experience God’s grace at work in our lives. As we forgive, we reflect God’s love and mercy, and we participate in the ongoing work of reconciliation in His kingdom. Through forgiveness, we experience freedom, peace, and restoration in our relationships with God and others. And while forgiveness is never easy, it is always worth it, for it opens the door to the fullness of life in Christ.